So if you read my blog you know I had a RNY gastric bypass, and then 7 years later became inflected with gastroparesis (paralyzed stomach). Eating and food to say the VERY least are touchy difficult subjects in my world. There are many days now that eating just isn’t worth the hassle, the fear of being ill FAR outweighs any desire to eat food frequently.
As a side note but oh the irony ~ my love affair with food was 85% of the precursor to my needing the bypass before my weight killed me. Now if they took food off the planet Id just be like “meh who cares”. That’s not what the blogs intended to address though but I love irony…ok moving right along.
Eating is a very personal decision dontcha think? What you eat, when you eat, how much etc etc. yet it’s one of those personal things that people seem to have NO ISSUE getting all up in your business about. People don’t generally chime in to tell us how much sex to have, or how many miles to drive, or how much sleep we should get, or how often to shower ~ all comparable ~ personal thing. Hell I think friends and family are even LESS likely to speak up about alcoholism or drug abuse ~ but boyyyyy pick up a fork and they’re on you like white on rice.
Whatever your circumstances ~ you’re thin, you’re fat, you’ve had WLS, you have a condition like Gastroparesis….every Tom Dick and Nancy thinks it’s ok to chime in and tell you what you should eat to fix what they thinks wrong. Now TBH 99.999% of the time these comments are given from a place of good intent and a good heart, and so I smile and move on. I swear to GOD though if about ten more people tell me to “eat more fiber eat more salad that’ll help your bowels” I’m going to scream.
I guess there are some things that are pretty status quo, if you see an insulin dependent diabetic sitting down eating a dozen glazed donuts ~ it’s probably fairly safe to assume that might not be a great choice. Technically also still probably none of your business, but at least the advice is sound advice right? Diabetes plus Glazed Donuts = bad combo.
I guess my frustration is with the people who have no clue what gastroparesis is all about, or how to live with it. Yes I get “salad is healthy” HOWEVER ~ a paralyzed stomach CANNOT in fact break down fiber and so that “healthy lettuce” will likely be thrown up later, how healthy is THAT? One of the first things they tell you when they diagnose you with GP is NO FIBER! So it’s frustrating to consistently hear people advising you who clearly have no idea what gastroparesis is about. Your probiotics are not going to fix my Vagus nerve ~ and if you don’t know what the vagus nerve is or what it does then trust me you’re not qualified to be giving me dietary advice at this stage in the game.
My point here is ~ whether it’s gastroparesis, a weight loss surgery patient, a diabetic, or just someone whom you think is thin or fat or unhealthy ~ think to yourself for a moment before giving out nutritional advice…kind of a flow chart, if you will, of questions to guide you through the decision to offer advice or no:
*️⃣ are you a nutritionist/dietician? No? Don’t speak.
*️⃣ are you legally/emotionally/financially and physically responsible for this person? No? Don’t speak.
*️⃣ are you more well versed than they are about their condition and/or situation? Are you up all all the medical and nutritional protocol? No? Don’t speak.
*️⃣ are you close enough to this person to give them the same level of in depth advice on other topics like their sex life and their finances? No? Don’t speak.
At the end of the day I realize people are well meaning for the most part ~ and I’ll continue to smile and take the salad and eat around the lettuce and life goes on lol ~ it’s just that as I approach that start of my 6th year with gastroparesis I’m so so tired of explaining why I’m passing on that beautiful salad 😂😂😂
Rant over ~ thanks for listening 😘