October 8th, 1970 I was born at Vassar Brother’s Hospital in Poughkeepsie, NY.
October 8th, 1989 my father died at that same location, even on the same floor that I was born.
Birthday’s are supposed to be a celebration of life, and I do celebrate my life today – but not from a selfish all about me point of view. It’s more a celebration of the blessings I’ve been given over the years. My parent’s were really good people, flawed as we all are of COURSE ~ but honestly just really good people. There were a couple years that it was a sad thing for me “my birthday his deathday”, it was of course raw ~ I was young and well ~ it just stung.
Then in 1993 I was going to become a mom (for the first and only time), and my due date was October 8th. To me that was like being given back the “blessings” of a day of birth – it was like a part of my father was being given back to me through my son and it once again changed my perspective on this date. Somehow that entire concept just made the day a “good day” again – because for the couple of years directly following my father’s death I hated my birthday.
My son in fact was NOT born on the 8th – he was a hold out and refused to exit until the 15th, (and that’s not a bad thing that he has his “own day” not associated with either my birth or my dad’s death); but in my heart he will always be a gift of this date. It’s funny because he reminds me a lot of my father too, a lot of his personality is very similar to my dad – and even his looks. I have a picture of my dad in his wayyyyy younger years when he was thin and just out of the service and OMG sometimes I look at my kid and see him!
So today is a good day – I’m blessed with life for 45 years now ~ I’m blessed with remembering the greatest dad everrrrr, and I’m blessed with a great kid who will be 22 next week and who unwittingly reminds me of dad so very much. Dad drove a truck for a living, and one of my scent memories of him that is one of my strongest is the smell of the diesel mixed with safeguard soap, when he would come home – he’d be in the bathroom washing his hands and of COURSE I was a spoiled brat and would be right up his but while he was doing so. So the combination of those two scents diesel and safeguard are a very specific trigger for me to feel safe and loved and blessed and so very happy, and when my kid comes home work smelling like diesel it’s just a little slice of heaven for me that he could never understand.
So thank you God for amazing parents, a great kids, 45 very blessed years and good memories – cheers to whatever comes next! Have a great day all, thanks for dropping by ~ talk to you soon.